Why I owe you a big apology!

I'm sorry.  So so sorry.

You are the most important thing on my blogosphere.  You must know that right? If not, let me tell you then I tell you why...

I think about you all day, pretty much every day.  You are on my mind and in my thoughts.  I remember I must tell you this and that, writing out the muse in my mind in a way I feel is creative enough to warrant that keyboard under my fingertips before I get a chance.
It's not about the writing, its about the reading. 

The readers...YOU.

Why do I need to apologise to you?  IT's on my mind to write to you constantly then I don't.
Bedtime comes around and I have talked myself out of writing. For whatever reason there might be.   I'm tired, I've got off the boil, I'm tired.  Yet what is the number 1 thing I want to be doing with my time when I'm not at work work or looking after the family? It's writing to you guys.


Now you see there have been many times of late when those 'monkey chatters' have been going round and round my mind telling me to do something sensible with my time. Something credible. Something that will make me a solid grounding amount of money to take care of the family.
Yet is that really what I want to be doing?  Is that what will fill my cup,  feed my soul and get the bit between my teeth in this journey called life?

The law of attraction has been fluent in my life for around 4 years now, yet still I tweak it and play around with it, arguing with it.  Then along it comes with a bang to tell me, "Not like that, like this."  More than ever before I feel it.  i feel a calling with such strength to tell you my stories, to teach what i know and to help you along your law of attraction journey too. I had never forgotten that.  Yet needed reminding.

You may know through my other posts or by my social media (especially Instagram which I have been active on lately) that I'm doing lots of travelling. I'm loving it.  Every day I mentally write  a blog post to you all with cute photos the minute I get a chance yet still they haven't made the cute to this blog.  They will.  As will my stories.  

Clarity hit me right between the eyes this afternoon as excuses be gone.  Not a chance in the world that I will sit and take that sensible chance.  I'm a writer.  It's in my heart.  In my crazy blonde curly hair and in my life.

Me, my crazy hair and a bit of travel

I will write for you guys.  Help me by reading my blog...



Love always


Louise xoxo 

How lost I feel when words fail me...

Losing count of how many times I have attempted to pick up my laptop recently, I wonder how to start...

Words never fail me.  Never do I suffer writers block.  Something inside me feels lost.  

What is going on?

Head lost.  New directions looming.  Challenges all around.  Sad people surround me as I do my best to lift them up.   

Yet all this time I am not writing.  Which you know is my passion.  

A firm believer in life taking twists and turns and taking you places you may not have thought about going, I do wonder how this is unfolding. 

Life and the law of attraction has been giving me the most massive signals for quite some time - do this, don't do that - and I have listened but not instantly.  I hear them but don't always act.  To leave devastating consequences with bigger messages.

Looking after my family is obviously  a massive thing right now.  Mum is still very poorly and doesn't think she will be heading home anytime soon.  Which is sad but lovely to have her.  This leaves me with a big question mark over my future.  

Tiny percentages of clients are overly demanding, not showing the big hearted care I would indeed show them at a time like this.  University is hotting up as we head towards the end of the second term of the second year.  We need to be there a lot. Still I love it.  My passion.  I get excited at the thought of going into university and soaking up like a sponge. Education.  Helping others.  Health.  I love it all.

Arriving home with nothing but exhaustion is the only explanation I can find for my lack of words.  
Still, I want to write.  Still I write mentally in my head.  Still there are those mental battles of which piece of writing comes next.  

Yet switching on the computer and getting those fingers effortlessly flying across the keyboard in the usual fashion seems near on impossible.

So what is the answer?

Last night, I wasn't ready to sleep.  Yet neither did I want to 'get into' the TV.  
Youtube called my name as I searched on the phone, "Full time blogger."  Hoping for inspiration, I was attracted to click on a lady who's name was Sarah.  She began to speak into the camera about her life, her fertility treatment, her twins and her cooking which she takes online to inspire others. Sounded like me! 8 years my junior, I watched my inspiration grow as she realistically told of hard work, late nights and those days when you question what you are doing.  Then she also told of her passion, as I watched her eyes sparkle.  Her time was her own to manage.  She could spend time with her children, get to the school plays,  be sponsored by holiday companies to go away and write and shoot photos.
My eyes began to droop as the familiar feeling of fatigue haunted me into sleep. 

This morning I have awoken refreshed, feeling so much better physically than yesterday.  A blessing indeed.  Coffee made (with soya of course!) I headed to this place. 

My writing desk; my space

Somewhere we set up a week ago to leave mum in peace to watch her daytime TV while I take a communication system to be envied by NASA (A Doorbell which you plug in) and head off to write, to study, to work.
Ok there is a little mess here already, yet my buddha candle, my daylight window and the birds tapping on the cabin roof while singing their early morning birdsong has me singing inside too. 

Just like Sarah, with hard work and determination I can do this. I mustn't lose sight of that. I can make it happen.  Days will be hard but I can get there.  We can all get there. 

Will you?