January said...

 

A new week? New year? New working opportunities? Or just labels which fuel anxious pressures?

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The tree is on the driveway now, shedding needles. ‘Don’t you get them in your feet,’ Mum would yell when we were children.

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Excitement we felt heading into Kings wood farm to choose our tree is history now, seeming long ago. Christmas, something to be excited about at last, was the twinkle in our eyes, our reason to smile. We would wake with those fuzzies and switch on the warm white fairy lights in the darkness of the early morning. We still felt the magic of Christmas, despite 2020.

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Now I stand in the starkness of the clean and tidy living room and nod. ‘Hmm, nice and tidy,’ I think as I look around. Yup. Nice and tidy. Fact.

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Has it gone; that magic? Or have we closed ourselves to it instead? After all, it is January. That bleak, dark and cold month which carries a thousand pressures to catch up at work, adhere to new shiny rules the boss saw fit to create. January is long.

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Of course, we could decide to leave those anxieties on the pillowcase as we begin this working week. We might realise that this is just like any other day, except for the label we have given it. Pressures were there in December; but with fairy lights. Seeming to have the answers to that magic feeling, the decorations and the Christmas warmth enveloped us with its love. Now they are gone. So it’s down to you. And me. It’s up to us to own this day, smash the worries to pieces. We have totally got this in control and we are going to see the magic in January too. Because that is simply who we are.

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We are strong. We are achievers. We want the best for ourselves and those around us. Facing January darkness, we need excitement here too.  Warm scarves, flasks in the car, working from home with hot water bottles, lighting candles. Finishing the day with a proud sigh, eating slow cooked meals in front of the fire. Early nights and less rushing around, and of course, memories of the love we felt from those who mattered just last week. If we didn’t feel it, they didn’t matter.

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‘Let’s do this.’ January said.

2020’s fault?

 2020’s fault?

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It’s not 2020’s fault. 2021 doesn’t hold the holy grail. No new answers will happen overnight as we sing auld lang syne. Microorganisms will still roam.

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2020 is a number we have given to a period of time, knowing that time doesn’t exsist.  It’s a measurement that we can relate to in order to co-ordinate ourselves with each other. 2021 is another number which we shouldn’t crown as an amazing milestone to reach. Rather, look back over these last twelve months in order to realise the strength we have all needed to grow into the amazing humans we are on New Years Eve.

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Placing hope in the midnight stoke is setting up for failure. Placing hope in the future self is positivity.  We can make the next steps happen, we can face challenges we previously thought unimaginable, and we can know how awesome we are in our own strength.

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The end of this crazy year is here. We have all labelled 2020. Look at the beauty in those numbers: 2020. Such a pleasing sight on the front of my journal which holds many words describing my feelings through this year. Such a huge year of achievements for so many of us. Please don’t let yourself forget that, among the sadness of the myriad of segments.

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I have learned so much about me, who I am, and how I love. I tried to harden my heart but I love openly and totally and that simply can’t change.  A stranger in the street, my girlfriends, my children, a lover; I love in totality and this is me.

Our time in this global challenge has given me wonderful clarity into what makes me happy.

Giving up the scales has been empowering and I have loved that. I feel happier in my own skin than ever, even when it feels physically bruised.  My aunt said she loves me, and ‘you’re smashing,’ which was a life changer to that little girl in me.

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Mentally, I’ve a way to go in relation to feeling loved and allowing past hurts to float away into non-resistance but the history of life shapes us into our current selves through lessons and scars.

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Scars never heal completely but they hold power in shaping us to strut into our future with a flick of the hair and a wink back at the past ‘us’.

Anstey Harris The Truths and Triumphs of Grace Atherton

Anstey Harris is the author of The Truths and Triumphs of Grace Atherton.




Thankfully, I had the absolute pleasure of meeting Anstey in summer 2018.  Following my acceptance onto the MA programme for Creative Writing I felt I really ought to get up to speed with a  little extra education and saw a short course up for grabs under the watchful eye of Anstey.

With vocabulary to demonstrate the glass half full within her teaching that summer, I felt at home in my new writer world.  Of course, only to be further impressed when this talented author showed us a copy of her book which was soon to be released by Simon and Schuster.

Finding the authors lurking over on Twitter was a great way of keeping in touch and knowing where to find them.  Anstey has kept her twitter page up to date with all of the upcoming signings for the book.

I, for one will be going along with excitement.  You might even spot some up and coming authors from my university cohort as we are all going to pick Ansteys expert author brain!

Where and when?

You can find the book and signing at Waterstones, Rose Lane, Canterbury in Kent on 

Saturday 16th February between 14.30-16.00

THE uplifting novel of 2019 is coming in January. Grace is about to fall out of love and into life in The Truths and Triumphs of Grace Atherton…#GraceTriumphs @Anstey_Harris pic.twitter.com/QIWqUcisSs

— Simon & Schuster UK (@simonschusterUK) November 29, 2018

My next few blog posts will be sharing stories of my own writer journey following some short pieces we created on Ansteys course.

Hope to see you at the book signing!

Louise xoxo 

I'm a qualified Scientist - but what's next might shock you!

Can you believe it? I’m a scientist with a degree! YES, Finally.

The journey hasn't been as pleasant as I had liked and I have documented the entire 3 years over on this blog and this youtube channel.  Go sub to them both as you can see my findings soon over there! Yes it's a raw and emotional diary.  I have loved keeping it! 

Finally finished my degree and onwards to better things. While the nutrition degree is so interesting and important - and I love helping my clients - I simply can’t help but continue to love my nutrition writing which brings me to a very exciting piece of news.

September I am proud to say I am going to start an MA which is a Masters degree in Creative Non Fiction Writing. Of course I will also be telling stories which is an absolute passion of mine! The tough time I have had at university has shown me exactly what I do want to be doing with my life. Making it happen is possible but I was never raised to believe in the dream coming true so I feel I’ve a little bit of a block there which I need to overcome. I will, I know. And you guys will help me too this I know. Sharing these posts is great. Thank you for every time you do that.

My current books can be found on this amazon page and of course there are lots more to come - watch this space.

Divine guidance