Routine and direction - things are exciting and FRIGHTENING

You lovely readers!!!

You have put a great big BIG smile on my face! Seeing the stats as I logged in to write this post has given me even more positivity and confirmation than I already had.

Thank you

Thank you

Thank You

You're all so gorgeous.


As you have seen, yesterday my miracle twins started college.  Did you read about the anxiety I had with wondering if I would see them grow up?  It seemed so far away in the future yet now - Boom!

Well, they had a blast on their first day, making new friends,  bumping into old friends, becoming independent by finding locker keys (I warned Jasmine no photos of Troy Boulton inside!) and getting bus passes.

Then came the timetables and the inspiration for this post.

Timetables to rule the next few months by.  We are all going to be so busy.  My university timetable (our campuses are right next door to each other!) is packed and both the twins were aghast that they have days they are working 8.30 til 6.  Wow.  Now the thing is, I have a chance to get working during that time when they will be needing nothing from me except silence and a long distance love in my heart.  

Right as I realised things are going to get busy for us all, I realised I also had to organise home help, dog sitter and maybe a little more home help.  Along with easy cook dinners.  Oh yes.  It's going to be dinner, bath, EastEnders and bed I think!
However, bang on time (thank you universe) I met up with Stacey.  I love her.  She's my right hand girl, helper and PA.  

Ordering healthy dinners and pen poised we sat in our local restaurant after much hugging (it's been far too long since we saw each other).  We knew we needed to make this a productive meeting.  Of course there was some gossip (we are girls!) and lots of planning for the future.

This might not seem so much of a shock to you all but we have decided to focus on my nutrition business.  Haha.  Why do people roll their eyes?  I have worried about the politics of nutrition but I know what I know and I also am sure I can help people!

So what's the frightening bit?  The lack of down time.  The mess that my house is sure to become.  The constant tail chasing but I am confident it is all a great move in the right direction!



Routine must become my new best friend as I fill my diary with appointments and timetables.  

Are you feeling more of a sense of purpose and routine now the children have gone back to school?

With love, as always

Louise xoxo

My twins are off to college!

Yes that's right, it's super hard to believe but my lovely children are off to college.



It seems just yesterday I was crying over another negative pregnancy test (yet also seems a lifetime ago so how does that work?!) and now here I am proudly waving them off to college.



I'm super excited for them, truth be told.



As a single mum of two little babies I did spend a lot of time in a panic.  What if something happened to me?  What if they had no one to take care of them?  Not only did I want to be there every step of the way but they needed a parent to bring them up too!  Honestly, there is this long story where I used to sit in bed at night trying to take my pulse as I could feel my heart racing.

Three times I ended up in the A and E being tested for heart issues.  I now know this was purely anxiety.  I refuse to say 'only' as anxiety and 'only' do not belong in the same sentence.  If you are a sufferer you will know that!  Anyhow, it wasn't without leaving scars on my health but I'm generally ok.  Enough to be a reasonably good mum (I hope the twins would agree).



My time at college (I had 7 years of it during my lifetime) was so much more amazing than school.  I hated school.  Bullies and silly people made life miserable.  So I was pleased to get my teeth stuck into college.

My two have loved school but are super excited for college.



I'm excited for them too!



Much love



Louise xoxo

Can't sleep; my writer head types on...

Oh how I wish I'd brought my laptop with me on this weekend break.

Swirling around my mind are more and more blog posts, stories, thoughts and I would love a keyboard to thrash it out on. 

Alas, the mobile phone app will do with one finger typing. 

Curtains ajar, window easing through cool September air, I see the daylight breaking creating silhouettes in the beautiful trees that surround our part time home. 

At my feet, Harley the shih tzu snores so loudly. 

In my stomach, my intestines whirr as my stomach feels acidic. 

While it's noisy, I don't feel great and I sit awake, I do have the precious time to think and type. 

Why don't we pull out all the stops to fulfill our dreams?

You see it's no secret on this blog that my online life of blogging and creating videos is something I adore. With ideas constantly overflowing, I would love the luxury of time to get all that out there. 

Realising now that I do have time while I'm here, I didn't bring the laptop!

In my defence, I thought there wouldn't be time here. It's family time. So important. Yet my lack of sleep gave me the quality silence I needed to write more. 

Meanwhile, I listen to the birds sing. 

Ready to search google for one of my law of attraction gurus to plant belief in my head for the next hour before my alarm goes off.

Become a super fan https://www.patreon.com/louiseusher

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Overwhelmed at Centre Parcs

As my shihtzu snores with gusto on the bed next to the man I love, I can't help this overwhelming feeling of what we are experiencing on our latest trip away. 

Centre Parcs in Woburn Forest was granted permission to become this amazing place just 5 years ago and now in all it's finest glory of nature, stands proud as our hosts.  My hopes and expectations were high for this mini break.  Yet I'm overwhelmed.  This amazing place sure has the Wow factor.

January was when we were booked to come here and enjoy a cold winter break.  You see we decided as a family to celebrate the twins 16th Birthday here.  Deciding against a party, I chose here for all of us as a family.  Specifically due to the idea that Mum and Dad could stay in the hotel to get a bit of quiet time away from Harley (the snoring shih tzu) and all of us really.  Booking a lodge for me, Scott and the twins was an easy decision.  

Living with the huge regret as I broke my Dads heart on his last conscious day of his life when I told him, "Dad, I don't think you are going to be well enough to come to Centre Parcs with us."  He cried uncontrollably and I so wish I could turn back the clock and not say that.  This was on the Wednesday before we were due to travel on the Friday.  Little did I know that Friday would be the day we were handed the devastating news that my lovely father wouldn't survive once his life support was switched off.  
As Dad took his last night of induced coma sleep, we tried to celebrate the twins birthday.  It was near on impossible.  Smiling was hard.  This was supposed to be for all of us.  Dad had been the most amazing Grandfather stepping into the absent fathers shoes for all things Dads should do.  

The day after the twins birthday was the day Scott and I sung Dad to sleep while I cradled his head.  He died peacefully and beautifully.  I know he would want us to smile and laugh and scream on the water slides.  So as I type my throat is raw with the Living I must do for Dad as we eat another piece of belated birthday cake.

Tranquillity comes as standard at this place and I honestly could not have imagined how amazing this wonderful woodland really is.

More posts will follow of what we have done and where we have been.  For now, something told my fingers to type out what my broken heart must have been thinking.  

Also, today is the day my Mum got to hold one of her beloved Barn Owls (a christmas gift Scott and I bought for her and Dad).

Jasmine with a BIG owl!

Precious.

Happy September! Time to get productive once again.

It's September.

Likened to January in terms of "I'll do this/change that now the children are back at school."

Are you guilty of this?  I know I am.  In my house we have had an amazing summer and seen so many places:

Majorca

Camping

Days out

and it's all been wonderful.

Just not wonderfully productive.

If you are a Mum or Dad with a homebased business and have found a lack of productivity in your business, don't worry.  It's happened to many of us.

My love for my business has not gone away.  Nor has the passion.  What I have found is, my priorities have been to ensure my twins have the best summer before they get off to college and grow up into adults.  Driving will be happening soon.  Responsibility of car buys and driving as well as part time working.  So it's only right and fair that I stepped up into Mum mode and got on with doing all those things I need to be doing as Mum.

Routine, hello again.  How we all adore you.

Good luck!!

Much love

Louise xoxo