Saturday 23 December 2017

Does this time of year make you feel reflective?

This time of year has me feeling different.  Cosy, a little sad, excited for the future, wanting to pack in everything all at once...

These past few days have been no different.  Lots to think about as we head in to the new year and I even made a video about it which will be going live on Christmas day.  I'm also really hoping to find time to create a flashback video for the past year, as I love those! Adore looking back on memories. Never been any different.  Before this digital era I would goto Boots to get my photos printed within an hour (I also used Truprint, do they still exist?) and I was overwhelmed to see the snaps we had taken.  Spending quite literally hours pouring over them again and again.  However,  I won't promise you or myself that this flashback to 2017 video will happen as there is uni work looming and it has to take some priority (as well as taking care of the family of course!).  Rest assured, I will be posting within a blog post if I can create it! 

What have I been doing these past few days?  Ok, it's been great actually.  Filling me with joy.  Just today, my beauty therapist said she can see my sparkle coming back! YES! That's definitely a want and need of mine.  That spark will be back in full swing in no time, this I know.  Being honest, I do wonder if the can of St Tropez mousse I used might have something to do with it.
Mum telling me, "You look really wishy washy." (whatever that means), prompted me to get out the ol fake tan and try and at least look like I don't have the toxic crohns thing going on.  (Still not been right since I was rushed to hospital recently but seeing Gasteroenterology next week- and no it doesn't just mean I poo lots - it's inflammatory.  Those who know, know but I will write a blog early in the new year all about Crohns over on my nutrition website.)

So back to it.  I went for  session at the garage to try and sort Nathans car. We had a sneaky breakfast on the way home at Frankie and Benny's and thankfully it was super busy with not quite enough staff.  So we had lots of time to chat which was absolutely lovely.  Putting the world to rites, discussing the future of him, me, us as a family and all that jazz.  

This frankie and bennys christmas straw made me grin :)

Jasmine and I spent some time car shopping at Audi.  This was an exciting thing to do.  
Driving to Tunbridge Wells through the trees reminded me of my wonderful times in Scotland and Wales. I love a good tree lane drive! While we were there I was tossing up between two cars and still remain undecided.  One was very pretty but Jas reminded me I was there to find something bigger to fit mums wheelchair in.  Hmm, true.  So I started looking at the Q range.  Loved the bells and whistles inside but I'm still crunching the numbers and Christmas kind of took over...

Teaching Jasmine the art of manifestation in the R8

Mum and I toddled off to church to the Christingle service which was amazing. I would talk about this more but I'm not sure this is the place.  Suffice to say the spiritual me sat up and remembered just how massive the entire universe is.  There is more out there than the little bit of stress in my bubble.

Taking the Christingle to the cemetery and trying to decorate in the same amazing way mum used to...

Visiting mums amazing friends I was overjoyed to make a new German Shepherd friend.  I used to have a German Shep.

I would say she was like this one but my baby was smaller and longer haired... anyhow, recently the friends had been organising Santa and the elves visits on a charity fundraiser for children with illnesses.  I'll find out the charity and report back to you but just look at this set up! Of course Santa isn't there now, he's off getting ready for the present drop during the big day.

Me looking tired but being bored with myself, adding a splash of colour to my hair. 

Days gone by.  Loved him then. Love him now. 

We will speak again soon my friends but for now, enjoy the build up to the big day

Love as always

Louise xoxo


Thursday 21 December 2017

|Christmas is almost here...what was I doing three, two and one year ago?

2014 saw my first Christmas at university.  Studying at London met, I used to enjoy the odd glass of wine as I was always travelling by train.

On this last day at uni of 2014, we went for drinks.  Then looking at expensive footwear! IT was funny. I remember it well.

2015 I began to realise I was taking a bit of a hit with my health.  Not up to doing too much about it at this stage, I hadn't realised we were entering a time where we would soon say goodbye to Dad after he enjoyed his last Christmas.

Then last year I was looking very blonde indeed.  And happy.  While Jasmine had got Glandular Fever, mum was unwell and I was less than enjoying my science at uni.  Clarity was beginning to hit me as I realised how exciting this was all becoming as more and more people ask me about becoming a blogger and youtuber.  So, I gave my advice on this video!

Of course I will be sharing more videos with you as I literally have just finished with my last client before Christmas but I really hope you have enjoyed these blasts from the past. I loved watching back over them! It reminds me of why I actually love making this stuff.  Looking back over the memories is incredible.  So for sure I will 100% be doing Vlogmas next year :)


Sunday 17 December 2017

Signs from loved ones from heaven?

Yesterday saw the end of Strictly come dancing 2017. It was amazing.  I could not take my eyes off the screen.

Dad and I used to dance.  I feel he sent me some vibes and a very big clue from heaven.

At the age of 12 I began the typical 'modern dance' that young girls do.  A year later it was ballroom and latin.  I loved it.  Scoring high in the 90s for my medal tests, I just felt dance was a part of me, a part of life.  Without it I simply wouldn't feel my heart beating.
As a family we would head off on dance weekends and I just couldn't get enough of it.

Beginning my career at 18 I had to pull away from the dance school and all my friends which was a really hard thing. I felt sure they would always be there for me though and the bond we had created would not be broken. I was sure they would understand just how hard my job was.
Even so, still I would bop while working, constantly. 

The career had to take a detour when I became a mum, also becoming single at the same time.

Adorable twins kept me super busy for a year.  Then I realised I needed to get a life back. Once a week I used to get mum and dad to babysit and I would go to a new type of dance I had never tried before, Ceroc.  I LOVED IT.
Shortly after this, my aunt fell so unwell and I knew that all the while I had the physical ability to dance, I should.  The same year I ran my first race for life with an ambition of running the total 5k regardless of how long it took.  I also became a Ceroc finalist at the National competition in London. I was blown away.  Coming 5th out of 160 couples.  My partner and I had the best time and we became unbreakable, or so I thought.  Dance made me feel alive.  So alive.  Keeping my mental health  in check and I hadn't realised at the time but my physical health too.

Ten years ago I fell in love. My new man was keen to come dancing with me too.  He could move pretty good.  I loved dancing with him and didn't mind at all that I was back to basics again.  We even headed to the competition floor after my previous partner told me he wasn't competing that year (but then did compete, with a much better dancer than me).  My new husband and I were knocked straight out.  Then a decline began. 
"I'm not sure I will come tonight, might get an early night. You go though..." of course I didn't go.  Well, you don't, do you.

Dancing Queen is on my funeral song list.  Which surely shows I feel I'm still that girl.  
Having not danced now for at least 8 years, my mental, physical health and wellbeing is just in ruins. Yet I refuse to believe it's done for.  It will come back.  Dance may help.
Having been thinking this for a couple of months since I became single,  it was on my mind every episode of Strictly.  


Last night, the final...each time someone walked into the living room I paused the TV, not wanting to miss a second of it.  The dance, the sequins, the hair and make up.  All so amazing.

My competition days are over. I know this.  My back crumbling and my muscles wasting.  Yet I have to try.   My eyes on stalks.  I loved it. The music.  There she was.  There was me.  I could have cried.

Then I the winner was about to be announced,  right in front of them was the trophy.  A glitter ball.  I gasped.

The night before I was at the university christmas ball.  We pulled crackers.  

My prize was a glitter ball.

Thank you for the message Dad xxx


Monday 11 December 2017

December Vlogmas day 10 - heartbreaks and toothaches

Nerve pain shoots through my ear and eye socket like a bolt of lightning.  "arghhh" I mumble as Jasmine asks what's wrong.
I know I will have to bite the bullet and get an emergency dentist appointment.  Not afraid of much.  Quite  tough cookie. Not when it comes to being reclined in the dentist chair about to face a needle, a drill and some dental work.

But this hurts 

Other hurt fills my life this pre-christmas season this year as other life stuff bubbles to the surface after a long time waiting.  Personal life stuff I cannot get into but suffice to say the positivity of the law of attraction is testing me right now as I decide there are a few good things to always come from the bad stuff...
Which leads me nicely on to next year.  Usually I skip the resolutions as we fail to keep them.

Last year (well, it's still this year isn't it) I made none.  2018 will see me warm myself into jive again. I missed the me who dances.  Part of my dancing feet defines me.  Or rather my dancing feet define a part of me.  She has been MIA for oh so long.  She's coming back.

As long as I have been a student, I have wished to join the choir. I haven't managed it yet.  Promising myself I would at least get along to listen to the beautiful gospel of "Oh Happy Day" ring out through the beautiful painted chapel...sadly that night mum was unwell.

My time.  I must make some of my time.  Meanwhile, I will spend a few minutes looking over these videos and remembering Vlogmas days gone by...

When we put the decorations up in 2014 and I wore that orange jumper...

Then last year you can see me beginning to feel a little confused about my future...

Plus I got all dressed up and went to the Christmas ball this day 2 years ago! What a great night :)

Sending much love to you all, as always

Louise xoxo


Sunday 10 December 2017

Vlogmas day 9 from the past 3 years

Let's head back in time.

What was I doing 2 years ago? Graduating from my nutrition, health, physchology and chemistry diploma

Then last year, my lovely son decided to come on one of my videos at last.  He's not shy, just not keen to be involved in my vlogs where Jasmine is.  Of course I love them both so totally differently :)

Then, 3 years ago, just as today, we were scraping the ice off the cars as it was FREEZing....

This year? I'm mostly taking care of mum with  a little help from the blood pressure machines and stuff. 
Hence, very few videos here to show here that are of new quality.  For which I apologise but this lack of excitement is a good thing as it means I get to look after mum.

Lots of love, always

Louise xoxo


Tuesday 5 December 2017

December 3,4,5th (?) #Vlogmas for the past 3 years

So I already lost track of what I am doing this Vlogmas so thank goodness I am not filming and editing Vlogmas for my Youtube channel.  Imagine?! I crave the day when I can VLOG and Blog to my hearts content. Will this happen next year at Christmas?  Could I possibly plan days of going out filming and finding things with amazing content to create beautiful cinematic videos to show you?

That depends so much on you guys enjoying what I'm sharing and you further sharing with your people too!
Many of you are asking me to share the secrets for making an online business and this will be coming next January for sure. Little snippets through the latter part of the winter and into spring then let's do lots more of that as we head into summer?  If that's something you would like to know more about please do come on down into the comments box and tell me. Knowing lots of you are shy philanthropists, of course I will respond to those inbox messages too! Let me know what you would like to see.  

So here are the videos I have brought out of the cupboard from dusty youtube to show you today.  I particularly love the one where we are at Greenwich watching the choir. I'm thinking back over that memory with great fondness.  We have tickets to go tonight too but mum isn't well enough and neither is she happy to be left so I'm here, working on a case study project, about to diagnose a small boy with iron deficiency anaemia.  

Can't wait to begin to focus on Christmas.

How is your Christmas going?


Sunday 3 December 2017

December 2nd for the past 3 years... #vlogmas

As promised (sorry I'm a day behind but I guess that's kind of how Vlogmas works) here are the past 3 years of me on December 2nd creating a little vlog :)

Hope you enjoy these.  Are you a #vlogmas 'er? If you are please head over to my twitter to share your videos with me as I would love to Rt them for you and also to go have a good look at them myself :) 




Also, do you want to see the one when I speak about the Yankee Candle Advent calendar?

How are your plans going for this Christmas?  Shops are crazy busy aren't they!!!

Much love

Louise xoxo


Saturday 2 December 2017

Why I'm not doing #Vlogmas this year

It's December already! Gosh.  Once again this seems impossible.  How did the time literally grow wings and fly so fast?

Something different in my world this December.  Ok, so lots the same, I will still have a birthday for example. Yet for the past 3 years I have participated in #vlogmas.  

What is VLogmas?

You VLOG each day in December in the lead up until Christmas. In other words, you get to be nosey in other peoples lives as they begin to prepare for Christmas.  Yes.  That's as simple as it is.  Although if you are a vlogmas participant you will 'have my back' when I say it's a lot of work! To create something beautiful and interesting takes a lot of time.

As a reader of my blog for a while, you are likely to know I have my hands full with my final year of university, looking after my mum, obviously seeing to the twins as always and general stuff around my own health and life.  Sensing vlogmas might be too much I have decided on another path instead:

I will be sharing my last 3 years Vlogmas over on my twitter page instead.  Each day, as if we are travelling back in time.  Gosh, 3 years ago I looked so much more well and healthy than I do right now! What happened?



2016 a particularly beautiful one.

Hope you enjoy! If you are doing vlogmas, tag me in twitter when you upload and I will enjoy watching and retweeting! 

Much love this vlogmas

Louise xoxo

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